The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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