OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Randomize
