girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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