wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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