Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
