I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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