Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
