The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
