i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
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