STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
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