Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
