well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I believe in your delicious
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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