some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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