all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
