The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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