well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
50% drunk capacity currently
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
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