At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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