covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
