got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
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