Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Randomize
