Texts From Last Night

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  (707): View more from California

  I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits

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  (707): I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits http://tfl.nu/21ol
  Replies (24) Good night (1846) Bad night (1048)
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  (909): View more from California

  WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN

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  (909): WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN http://tfl.nu/7vj7
  Replies (185) Good night (4344) Bad night (18942)
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  (310): View more from California

  I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.

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  (310): I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets. http://tfl.nu/76ec
  Replies (16) Good night (764) Bad night (2810)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.

  (1-360): View more from Washington

  That changes everything.

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  (360): I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy. (1-360): That changes everything. http://tfl.nu/pss9
  Replies (27) Good night (5037) Bad night (790)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper

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  (303): she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper http://tfl.nu/xl5z
  Replies (89) Good night (9917) Bad night (1677)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Bad news is he broke up with me via text message

  (561): View more from Florida

  But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville

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  (561): Bad news is he broke up with me via text message (561): But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville http://tfl.nu/1qx8
  Replies (28) Good night (7023) Bad night (1364)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.

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  (972): I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car. http://tfl.nu/qc2u
  Replies (3) Good night (1058) Bad night (2381)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.

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  (850): your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing. http://tfl.nu/7ema
  Replies (11) Good night (703) Bad night (1691)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin

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  (816): And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin http://tfl.nu/pn96
  Replies (7) Good night (502) Bad night (1062)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.

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  (+44): How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic. http://tfl.nu/9kr6
  Replies (12) Good night (1016) Bad night (898)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room

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  (513): Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room http://tfl.nu/wjdc
  Replies (4) Good night (1118) Bad night (401)
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  (353): View more from

  I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!

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  (353): I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?! http://tfl.nu/o40o
  Replies (2) Good night (785) Bad night (218)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!

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  (440): I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?! http://tfl.nu/61is
  Replies (4) Good night (548) Bad night (224)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING

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  (401): I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING http://tfl.nu/z6d9
  Replies (1) Good night (501) Bad night (248)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.

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  (585): Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire. http://tfl.nu/1iqw
  Replies (3) Good night (526) Bad night (357)

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