i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction