Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize