Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
