she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
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