we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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