i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
