Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
