Duck Duck Cougar?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
