Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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