The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize