Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize