I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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