Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
so explain again why im purple
no
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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