I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam đ
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now sheâs a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. âHigh maintenance hotâ doesnât even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
