they need to just BURY HIM!
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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