I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
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