try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
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I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
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I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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