Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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