with your own penis?
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
