Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Randomize
