Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
