So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Your topless pictures make me question reality
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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