He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
