Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
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I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
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I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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