But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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