but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize