i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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