What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Buhtt sex?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
