I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Randomize