Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
We just shotgunned beers for America
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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