You can't special order awesome
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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